FAITH AND FAMILY

SPRING 2019

Setting the Stage for First Communion: A Bedtime Q&A

MANY FAMILIES AROUND THE ARCHDIOCESE are getting ready for a First Communion: shopping for a kid-sized suit or white dress, summoning relatives, perhaps planning a party. Amid the celebration, how can we ensure that our children appreciate the deeper meaning of the sacrament? Sr. Cora Lombardo, ASCJ, director of religious education at Immaculate Conception / Assumption Parish in Tuckahoe, offers some pointers for parents.

QUESTIONS CAN OPEN US UP to God and each other, and the right ones will help prepare our children to receive the transformative blessings of the Eucharist. Here are three for parents to ask their little communicants each evening before tucking them in.
 

1. What do you want to thank God for?

Our society is one of entitlement. This question shifts our focus to the good things God is giving us right now; it nurtures an attitude of gratitude – a virtue we want to encourage in our children.

In Greek, the word eucharistia means “giving thanks.” By asking this question, you help prepare your child to celebrate Mass. You gently remind her or him that we go to Mass to give thanks to God, to praise Him for all that He does for us.
 

2. What do you want to tell God you’re sorry for?

We all miss the mark somewhere in our day. When we ask this question, we encourage our children to think about where they may have sinned and to learn the difference between a sin and a simple mistake.

Perhaps your child responds: “I spilt milk at supper!” You know this was an accident, so you ask, “Did you do that on purpose?”

“No, Mommy!”

“That’s an accident, not a sin,” you explain. “A sin is something we do on purpose.”

But what if your child answers, “I’m good, Mommy!” on a day when you know there has been a scuffle between siblings? This calls for a different sort of follow-up question: “Do you remember how you fought with Mary this morning?” A friend of mine did this with her son and helped him discover that something he had done truly was a sin.

Why do this? You are the primary educator of your child. These short faith dialogues are examples of family catechesis. They help young children understand the holy sacrament of reconciliation and prepare them to receive the mercy and forgiveness that Jesus wants to give them.
 

3. Whom do you want to pray for?

We want our children to grow up to be generous adults, aware of the needs of others. Through this question, we teach them to notice who needs help, who is struggling, who is sick, and to fulfill Jesus’ command: “Love one another as I love you.”

After your child names someone to pray for, you might ask, “Is there anything else we can do? Do you want to make a card for them? Shall we bake a cake and visit them?”

Questions like these draw our attention away from ourselves and toward others; they lead us toward a life of service.

You may not remember to ask these questions every night, or you might not get to all three. No matter. What counts is that you and your child are having a “God conversation.” You are modeling how we can look at each day and find God in it. You are walking your children through the day and showing them how to be grateful for the good, sorrowful for their sins and of service to those in need. Not bad for a 10-minute chat!